The New Understanding
by TitansRule
Summary: Tag to 3x10 'The New Deal'. "She was Elena Gilbert and he was Damon Salvatore and they were complicated." Elena won't let Damon walk away without talking about what just happened, because she's kept quite for too long, and she and Damon come to an important conclusion. Delena FRIENDSHIP, with mentions of Stelena and Datherine.


**Disclaimer: I don't own The Vampire Diaries.**

**This my first Vampire Diaries fanfic, and characters may be a little OOC.**

_She was Elena Gilbert and he was Damon Salvatore and they were complicated._

"You should know this, Elena … Stefan didn't screw us over."

Damon's words cut through Elena like a sudden ray of light through a thunderstorm. She tried to speak, but couldn't – it seemed impossible … it _was_ impossible, wasn't it?

Stefan had saved Klaus's life.

Klaus.

Evil Original Klaus.

Klaus, the guy who had compelled Stefan to turn his humanity off and feed on her.

That Klaus.

Stefan saved him.

And then still didn't come home, despite being free from Klaus's service.

"He screwed us over," Damon conceded, apparently realising she was lost for words, "but he had a good reason."

"What?" Elena asked.

Damon let out a breath. "He saved Klaus … to save me. And then he stole the coffins to get even."  
Elena closed her eyes for a second, savouring the moment. It seemed to be the silver lining she was hoping for, that Stefan was still in there … somewhere.

Her own voice seemed to echo in her head. _"I think that you're gonna be the one to save him from himself. It won't be because he loves me. It'll be because he loves you."_

Then the moment was broken, and she opened her eyes again, because she still had questions, because Stefan still wasn't home. "Damon, if he did it to protect you, then why would he even do that … I mean … what does that even mean?"

"What does it mean?" Damon repeated, stepping away from her. "It means I'm an idiot. Cause I thought for one second that I didn't have to feel guilty anymore."

_Guilty?_

Elena could practically see the walls shooting back up. That was the last thing she wanted. She had swiftly learned that there were two sides to Damon, and lately the more human side was prevalent.

But sometimes, when the emotion got too much for him or he felt he was getting too vulnerable, the walls came up again and he turned back into the monster that had swept into Mystic Falls with chaos in his wake.

The sooner she got them down again, the better.

"Wait, what are you talking about? Guilty for what?"

Damon took a step towards her, his eyes searching hers – for what, she didn't know. "For wanting what I want."

Elena sucked in a breath. "Damon …"

"I know." Damon interrupted, attempting a smile. "Believe me, I get it. Brother's girl, and all."

As he walked away, Elena fought to form words, something, _anything_ to verbalise the thoughts racing through her mind.

This was the part of their relationship they never discussed, even though they both knew very well how he felt about her.

Part of her (an admittedly selfish part) had been hoping they'd never discuss it.

But then they didn't have to now.

It wasn't the first time his feelings for her had come to the surface, and they'd managed to get away with not discussing it so far.

Maybe …

"No." Damon's voice cut through her thoughts, and she realised that he had stopped on the top step of her porch, and had turned to face her. "No, you know what? If I'm going to feel guilty about something, I'm going to feel guilty about this."

He strode back towards her, and her eyes widened momentarily, before his mouth landed on hers.

Automatically, Elena's hands rose to push him away, but something made her hesitate. The initial desperation of his touch had melted away almost immediately to something soft and sweet and … there.

His hands cupped her face, and her fingers curled around his, not trying to remove them, but needing to anchor herself, because her knees were about to buckle, not from euphoria, but from relief.

Sweet, wonderful relief that turned to guilt a second later, because they couldn't keep pretending anymore, and she would have to say it …

But then his lips left hers, and their eyes met, and her stomach jumped at the mild confusion in his eyes.

Maybe it wouldn't be so bad.

"Goodnight." He whispered, releasing her.

"Damon, wait." Elena finally managed to call, when he reached the steps. "We need to talk about this."

Damon stopped, his shoulders sagging slightly. "Elena, I know what you're going to say."

"I don't care." Elena said. "We need to talk, Damon. Please come inside."

For a second, she didn't think he would comply, but then he turned to face her, and she flinched slightly, seeing the cold, distant look in his eyes.

_Great. A heart-to-heart with the Other Damon. Just what I need._

She said nothing, re-entering the house, knowing that Damon was following just behind her. She knew that Ric had gone out for the evening, and Jeremy was upstairs, probably packing to leave, so they were unlikely to be interrupted.

She hesitated momentarily, but made for the living room, sitting down on the sofa and looking at him expectantly.

He sat down next to her, his body stiff. "So talk."

"Don't do this, Damon." Elena said softly. "Don't think for one minute that this is easy for me. And I can't just switch off my feelings. So you shouldn't get to either. You can hate me tomorrow."

Something flickered in Damon's eyes. "I could never hate you, Elena."

Tucking her legs beneath her, Elena twisted her body to face him. "I have to say some things, Damon, okay? And I need to you listen, because I need to apologise. I haven't been very fair when it comes to you … I've been … I've been selfish. Because I know how you feel about me and …"

"Elena." Damon interrupted. "You don't _know_ anything – you're assuming …"  
"You love me." Elena said softly, cutting him off. "And because you love me, you can't let yourself be selfish with me."

Damon seemed to freeze at her words, his eyes widening. "That … But you … I …"

"I shouldn't remember." Elena finished. "Because you compelled me to forget. I'd been kidnapped by two vampires, compelled by an Original and lost my necklace, Damon. The first thing I did when I got home was drink vervain."

"Shit." Damon muttered, closing his eyes. "Why didn't you say anything?"  
"I wasn't sure what to say." Elena admitted, looking down at her lap. "I knew you had feelings for me – you made that pretty clear when you killed my brother." She saw him hide a wince and almost reached out to squeeze his hand.

Almost.

"But to hear it like that … it scared me, Damon." Elena admitted, her voice dropping even more. "I didn't … I _don't_ want to be Katherine."

"Elena, you are nothing like Katherine." Damon said firmly. "You are the opposite of Katherine. And I mean that as a compliment."

The add-on confused Elena for a second (_he hates Katherine, of course it was a compliment_), but she brushed it off. "It was just so much easier to pretend I couldn't remember. And then you were dying … but we never talked about that either. But … I can't ignore this anymore, Damon. It's not fair to you, and it's not fair to me."

"I know." Damon said heavily. "I know what you're going to say."

"You don't _know_ anything." Elena said, throwing his words back at him. "You're assuming."

"You're my brother's girlfriend." Damon said, his lips twisting into a smirk. "And I was out of order when I kissed you just now."

"Ex-girlfriend." Elena corrected, her heart aching just at the thought.

"Alright, ex-girlfriend who's still in love with him." Damon amended, rolling his eyes.

"For God's sake, Damon, would you let me talk?!" Elena snapped.

"There's nothing to talk about, Elena." Damon said, getting up. "You're in love with Stefan, as you should be. We're going to sort this mess out, kill Klaus, get Stefan back, and you two can ride happily into the sunset. It's fine."

Elena caught his hand and pulled with more strength than he was expecting, causing him to sit down again. Twining her fingers with his, she reached up with her free hand to touch his face. "I love you, Damon." She said softly. "I do. Don't think for one second that being in love with Stefan negates that. You're one of my best friends – in fact, I think you may _be_ my best friend. I meant what I said tonight, I couldn't have done any of this without you. The last thing I want to do is hurt you, Damon, I don't want to be Katherine …"

"You're not." Damon interrupted with a sigh. "You're _definitely_ not Katherine."

Elena tilted her head to regard him curiously. That was the second time he'd said that, but there was something in his voice that suggested that there was a dual meaning to that statement. "Damon?"

Damon cupped her face, looking deep into her eyes. "I understand what you're saying, Elena, and I appreciate that. But something about that kiss is … bugging me, I suppose."  
"In what way?" Elena asked cautiously.

"I don't know." Damon admitted, his thumb stroking her cheek almost habitually. "Can I kiss you again and find out?"

Elena hesitated for a split-second, then nodded. This kiss was soft and tender right from the offset, the kind that could – and probably should – have set her heart fluttering at a hundred beats per minute.

As it was, she found herself smiling when they parted, and he looked at her seriously.

"Elena Gilbert," he began gravely, "would you be terribly offended if I told you that I'm not in love with you."

It wasn't what she was expecting to hear, but she still let a sigh of relief escape her lips. "No, I wouldn't." She said faintly. "In fact, I think I'd thank you."

"You're welcome." Damon said, his grim tone giving way to slight bewilderment.

"What's wrong?" Elena asked.

"I just don't understand." Damon admitted with a frown. "I was convinced …"

"At the risk of psycho-analysing you," Elena said softly, "can I make a suggestion?" She didn't get a response, but pushed on anyway. "You loved Katherine. I mean, you were completely in love with her, and at some point, that hurt so much that you switched your humanity off. And you didn't switch it back on again until after you'd met me. And when you did, you felt something for me, and the closest you could get to was what you felt for Katherine, so that was the conclusion you came to. But Damon, I'm not …"  
"You're not Katherine." Damon finished in a whisper, realisation dawning in his eyes. "You're Elena. You're my best friend. And I love you."

This time when he said it, there was no fear pooling in her stomach, no guilt about hurting him, just pure elation that she wasn't going to lose him, and she threw her arms around his neck, burying her face in his collar, feeling him draw her closer.

"I'm still in love with her." He said into her hair. "I shouldn't be. I hate her."

"My mom used to say that love and hate are two sides of the same coin." Elena offered, turning her head so he could hear her. "That you can't truly know hate unless you can love them."

"Klaus." Damon said bluntly.

Elena shrugged. "Well, there are exceptions to every rule."

Damon shook his head slowly. "When I first arrived in Mystic Falls … I thought if either of us was going to project our feelings for Katherine on to you … it'd be Stefan, not me. Guess I was wrong."

Elena nodded absently. "What are we going to do?"

"About Katherine?" Damon asked.

"About Klaus." Elena corrected. "Don't go getting a one-track mind on me."

"Wouldn't dream of it." Damon said, poking her side and making her giggle. "I was talking about Katherine when you asked. I don't know. Work out what the hell Stefan's up to."

Elena tilted her head back to see his face. "Is his humanity on or off right now?"

"Honestly, I don't know." Damon said, frowning slightly. "I think it's more of a dimmer switch, which is bad, because I have no idea how far he's willing to take this."

Elena pulled away, her eyes scanning his face for any signs that he was joking around, but found none. "What does that mean?"

"It means, as much as I hate to say it, that Stefan is not safe." Damon said in a low voice. "I wish he was, Elena, for your sake, but he's not. Right now, he doesn't care about anything aside from taking out Klaus, and I don't want you to get hurt. So just … be careful, alright? I just figured out what you are to me, I don't want to lose you."

"I'll be careful." Elena whispered. She could see raw vulnerability shining in his eyes for once, and she knew about much he hated that, so she forced a smile. "After all, I'm the only one who'll put up with your brooding for more than a few minutes."

Damon's face broke into a smirk. "Not true. Ric puts up with me. Don't you, Ric?"  
Elena looked up, startled, only just realising that Ric had returned and was leaning against the kitchen table, watching them curiously.

"I tolerate you." He corrected. "Elena's the only one who puts up with you."

"That's because Elena is the only one around here with any class whatsoever." Damon said, releasing her. "I'd better get going."

"Are you sure?" Elena asked. "I was gonna call Jeremy down so we could watch a movie together. Last one before he leaves." The words were heavy in her throat, sticking like tears, but she knew it was for the best.

Damon looked from her to Ric, and Elena pretended not to notice her history teacher-slash-guardian's gesture towards her. "Sure." He said. "I'll stay."

"I'll get Jeremy." Ric said. "You choose a movie."

"_Titanic_." Damon advised, as Elena crossed to the movie cabinet.

"You hate that movie." Elena stated, turning to face him with narrowed eyes.

"Yeah." Damon conceded. "But Jeremy's got a secret love for it, and it always makes you cry."

"And that's exactly what we want." Elena finished sarcastically.

She didn't hear him move, but she still wasn't surprised when his voice sounded from directly behind her rather than across the room. "Elena, you're going to cry anyway, and Jeremy knows you." He lowered his voice. "Compulsion only works as long as you don't question it, Elena. If you're going to cry anyway, you're going to need a reason."

Elena nodded silently as Ric and Jeremy joined them, slipping the DVD into the player. As the opening credits rolled, Jeremy made his obligatory complaints, but no one missed the smile that graced his face or the fact that he shut up as soon as the actual movie started.

Elena found herself tucked under Damon's arm, her head resting on his shoulder. It felt as though a great weight had been lifted from her.

She no longer had to worry or feel guilty about seeking comfort from him, no longer had to second guess her words or her actions for fear he would take them the wrong way or that they would hurt him.

_She was Elena Gilbert and he was Damon Salvatore and they were best friends._

**AN: Please let me know what you think - no flames please!**


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